Yesterday I asked you about your common phrases. But so what? Why does it matter if I say “no worries” vs. “whatever”? Why should I say “it’s all good” instead of complaining about what isn’t so great? Do I really think we should all be blindly giddy as we accept whatever comes our way?

Of course not.

The point and power of gratitude isn’t that you maniacally accept a miserable existence. It’s that you find sources of strength that lift you up so that you are better able to face your challenges.

There is a parallel in exercise and music. Costas Karageorghis is an associate professor of Sports Psychology at Brunel University and has studied the effects of music on exercise for 20 years. His research has shown that higher tempo music leads people to exercise harder and longer and even enjoy the exercise more than with low tempo music. The soundtrack leads to a more or less pleasant experience and higher or lower performance.

Your word choices are your daily soundtrack. “No worries” lightens your load. “TGIF” leads you to dread Mondays. Positive words aren’t there to push you to stay stuck in a job or marriage or home or relationship or setting or life that you don’t want. Just as up-tempo music isn’t there to lull you into not working out. The positive words give you a foundation of energy from which to act to change your circumstance.